Man Irons Wife After She Assaults Him With Sex Toy

A jury found Hugo Alquicira of Hutto, Tex. guilty of aggravated assault with a deadly weapon on Thursday despite claims that he never ironed his wife. Prosecutors had alleged that police were called to his home after he attacked wife Maria Puente with a heated iron.

Alquicira had an even more bizarre defense to the already bizarre crime. He told jurors that he had pushed Puente onto the bed after she "penetrated his buttocks with a plastic sex toy."

The shocking testimony caused the judge to order the jury out of the room, reports the American-Statesman. Puente must be a small woman, as the judge asked the defendant how she could have possibly completed penetration.

Hugo Alquicira changed his story and instead said that she touched his buttocks with the toy.

Even if the jury believed the sex toy story, they had to have found that it did not justify the use of an iron in self-defense. Self-defense laws only allow victims to react with proportional force. For example, they don't give victims the right to shoot someone who punches them in the face.

And they certainly don't give a man the right to iron his wife when he doesn't like her bedroom antics.

And from testimony provided by the couple's daughter Natalie, that seems to be just what he was doing. She told the jury that she had broken into her parents' room during the argument, according to the Statesman. Inside she found her mother standing in a ripped shirt and covered in bruises. Hugo Alquicira was holding an iron.

Related Resources:

• Man claims wife attacked him with sex toy (Gaston Gazette)
• Defending Yourself Against a Criminal Charge (FindLaw)
• Florida Woman Assaults Girlfriend with 'Female Sex Toy' (FindLaw's Legally Weird)