Cohabitation and the Law: Tips and Warnings

Cohabitating couples are people who live together even though they are not married. Although they may share the rent, utilities, food, and other daily expenses, they do not enjoy the legal protections of marriage. This can be frustrating as it can negatively impact the couple’s lives.

No matter how stable your relationship, it's crucial to protect your interests and ensure a secure future. A local family law attorney can help you draft an enforceable cobabitation agreement or other contract.

Here, we’ll offer tips to help cohabitating couples avoid major pitfalls and address cohabitation laws as they relate to unmarried couples who live together.

Cohabitation and the Law: What You Should Do

Cohabitation is a common practice among many unmarried couples. Many same-sex couples had no choice but to cohabitate before same-sex marriages became legal in the United States. Even today, many people in a domestic partnership choose to live together without the benefits of marriage.

There are ways you can protect yourself if you’re in a long-term relationship with someone you have not married. Some of these tips include:

• Enter into a cohabitation agreement before moving in together. This agreement can set the ground rules for financial obligations and other domestic issues. A cohabitation agreement can help prevent major headaches if your relationship doesn't last. You can draft an agreement yourself or consult a family law attorney for help.
• If you and your partner are considering marriage, draft a prenuptial agreement. This legal document establishes terms for probate, healthcare, estate planning, inheritance rights, and life insurance. For example, you may include a clause that addresses whether your surviving partner will be the beneficiary of your life insurance policy.
• Draft a power of attorney. This will allow you and your partner to make important legal, financial, and medical decisions on each other's behalf.
• Ensure that the title of any major purchase is in the name of the person who paid for it. For instance, if you make a down payment on a new car and make all the monthly payments, the vehicle should be in your name only. Conversely, joint purchases should be in the names of both cohabitating partners.
• Keep most bank accounts separate. While most couples offer each other financial support during their relationship, keeping your finances separate helps avoid disputes should you and your partner break up.
• Keep accurate records of your financial contributions to any property your partner holds. Not only will this demonstrate that you’ve met any financial responsibilities in your relationship, but it will also help establish your property rights.
• Write "gift" or "loan" on checks you give to your partner. This negates the suggestion that you supported them during your cohabitation period. Otherwise, your partner may demand palimony after you end the relationship. Palimony is similar to alimony. The only difference is that the courts issue palimony when ex-partners were never married.
• Keep your parental rights in mind. Remember, a never-married parent has the same child support rights and obligations as an unmarried partner. This means that cohabitation will not impact child custody and child support.

For more information on protecting your rights as a cohabitant, see FindLaw's Cohabitation Agreements page.

What to Avoid When Living Together

When you’re married, you and your spouse have automatic rights, such as the right to inheritance and alimony (in certain situations.) However, when your marital status is “single,” you must be careful about how much control your significant other has over your life.

For example, married couples typically have the right to make medical decisions on behalf of their spouse. When you’re cohabitating, you don’t have that right. It's important to consider these things if you choose to live with your partner rather than get married.

Some other important considerations include the following:

• Never commingle your money, incur joint debts, or make large joint purchases. This will help avoid legal complications such as a palimony suit.
• Don’t allow your cohabiting partner to hold sole title to significant purchases. You must ensure that you have a legal right to shared property. The only way to do this is to hold joint title to valuable assets. This is true even if your significant other orally agrees that the property belongs to both of you. The court will not recognize your legal interest in property based on a spoken promise. A written legal agreement is your best option.
• Be cautious about co-signing or guaranteeing debts for your partner. If you do, the court will hold you responsible for these debts.
• Avoid being financially dependent on your partner. Divorced spouses may have legal obligations to provide spousal support. This is not true for former cohabitants. If you choose to rely on your partner financially, consider a written agreement that establishes your financial rights and responsibilities should the relationship end.
• Don't present yourselves to the public as a married couple or use the same last name, even casually. This will help avoid the legal complications of a palimony suit. It can also help prevent common-law marriage (in states where it is recognized) issues if the relationship ends.

If you plan to enter a civil partnership, consider speaking to a family law attorney first.

Get Legal Help with Cohabitation and the Law

Cohabitation can lead to certain legal obligations and disputes, especially regarding property ownership. Depending on state laws, it may also raise questions about common-law marriage.

Before making any decisions, talk to a family law attorney. A family lawyer can provide helpful legal advice about your legal rights. They can help guide you through legal issues related to cohabitation.