Questions For Birth Parents: Adoption Plans

After you've made the adoption decision, you must create a plan. For birth parents, adoption attorneys can help craft an effective adoption plan. This plan outlines the preferences of birth parents, such as the type of adoptive family they'd like to place their child with.

The plan always considers whether the birth parents want a closed adoption or an open adoption. And if you opt for open adoption, to what degree would you like information to be open or closed to the child. In other words, do you want a fully open or semi-open adoption?

Birth parents have parental rights and legitimate concerns. An experienced adoption attorney can help ensure that those legal rights are protected. However, the birth family and the adoptive family should have separate and independent counsel to avoid the possibility of a conflict of interest during the legal process. Adoption lawyers can also do the following:

  • Explain the state laws relevant to your adoption plan
  • Provide useful information about background checks
  • Help you navigate the adoption process

There are many common questions to consider. The following questions can help the birth mother and the birth father start thinking about some of the critical issues. Reviewing the answers with an attorney is an important next step in the process of making an adoption plan for the child.

Adoption Plans and Questions for Birth Parents

1. Why do I want to place this child for adoption? Why do I want to put this baby up for adoption?

2. Is this my own, free-will decision, or is someone else (like my parent or significant other) influencing or forcing me to make this choice?

3. Does the other parent agree with the decision to place this child for adoption?

4. Do I want to choose the parent(s) for my child? Will the adoption agency decide? _______________________

5. What kind of parents would I like for my child?

6. Race/ethnicity ____________________________

7. Religion ________________________________

8. Age ___________________________________

9. Married or single _________________________

10. Ideal family makeup/other family members ___________________________

11. Number of other children in the prospective immediate family __________

12. Education _______________________________

13. Do I want both prospective parents to work or one to stay home? _________________

14. Other characteristics:

15. Their reasons for wanting to adopt: Infertility issues, desire for a large family, etc.:

16. Do I want a relationship with the adoptive parents during the pregnancy?

17. Do I want the adoptive parents to be in the delivery room for the child's birth? _______________

18. Do I want a relationship with my child post-adoption? ________________

19. How (and how often) do I want to make contact? ______________________________

Phone ____________________________________________________

Mail or e-mail ______________________________________________

In person _________________________________________________

20. Do I want the adoptive parents to keep me informed without my initiating any involvement?

21. Other questions to ask prospective adoptive parents:

22. Questions to ask my attorney: You will no doubt have questions for your adoption attorney. Here are frequently asked questions (FAQs) that birth parents ask their attorneys:

  • What is your adoption professional experience? Qualifications?
  • What are the costs of your services? Are there any financial assistance options?
  • What types of adoption do you cover? Open or confidential, or both? Do you work primarily with birth parents or prospective adoptive families?
  • What adoption services do you provide? What adoption counseling options are available?
  • How do you deal with an unsupportive biological father? How do you handle the father's rights if they don't consent to adoption?
  • What does the best interest of the child standard mean for adopted children?

Birth Parents and Adoption Plans: Related Resources

The following resources will help you get up to speed on the general procedures of adoption and the laws in your state.

Have Additional Questions About Adoption Plans? Contact an Attorney

It doesn't matter whether you're a teen with an unplanned pregnancy or a parent with high living expenses who can't afford to raise more children. If you're a birth parent considering placing a child for adoption, you're likely facing a difficult choice. You probably have a lot of questions about your child becoming an adoptee. If you're a prospective birth mother who wants to connect with a waiting family, making an adoption plan is a good idea first. Consider contacting an adoption attorney near you.

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Can I Solve This on My Own or Do I Need an Attorney?

  • It is a good idea to have an attorney for complex adoptions
  • An attorney can ensure you meet all legal requirements and that your adoption is finalized appropriately
  • An attorney can help protect the best interests of adoptive children, adoptive families, and birth parents
  • For simple adoptions, you may be able to do the paperwork on your own or by using an agency

Get tailored advice at any point in the adoption process. Many attorneys offer free consultations.

 Find a local attorney

Don't Forget About Estate Planning

Adopting a child is an ideal time to create or change your estate planning forms. Take the time to add new beneficiaries to your will and name a guardian for any minor children. Consider creating a financial power of attorney so your agent can pay bills and make sure your children are provided for. A health care directive explains your health care decisions and takes the decision-making burden off your children when they become adults.

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